| When should I return to work? | |
| Yes this is normal. Tears are a sign of strength and we cry because we've loved and lost someone significant in our life. We are "feeling" human beings and we need to express our feelings. Crying is one way of showing how we feel. | |
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| I cry all the time. Is this normal? | |
| You may need to be off work if you are unable to concentrate and are extremely tired all the time. This again is individual and also depends on the type of work you do. Ask your employer if there is a period where he/she can accomodate you in another area until you feel you can do your regular job. You may feel well enough to return to work immediately and this is perhaps what you need. Whatever decision you make, will be right for you. Consult your employer and ask for assistance when necessary. They may have suggestions that will help you. Many employers also have Employee Assistance Programs whereby they too offer support. Make inquires. They may have something that will benefit you. Take advantage of help that is offered. | |
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| When will I feel better? | |
| Grief is unique and very individual. We each grieve in our own way. Grief is a process not an event. There are no quick fixes. You will never get over the loss however, the pain will lessen and you will feel better as you reconcile with the loss of a loved one. | |
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| How do you reconcile with the death? | |
| You must move towards your grief and get on a path of healing your sorrow and pain. Do not move away from your grief. As time goes by you will see yourself progress to feeling better. Time will help ease the pain as well. How much depends on each and every individual. Don't compare yourself with anyone else and do not allow others to tell you when you should be feeling better. | |
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| How long does this last? I felt better last year than I do this year. | |
| This is also very normal. Reality sinks in, the shock has worn off and you feel more pain. As the first of every event occurs e.g. Birthdays, Christmas holidays, Anniversaries, you are still missing your loved one and may get annoyed with yourself for feeling badly again. It takes time but you will feel better. | |
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| Am I going crazy? | |
| Time gets distored, you are forgetting things, you have no energy, you cry a lot, you are confused and irritable, you want to be left alone. This is normal. No, you are not going crazy. These feelings and expressions are normal and necessary to help in you healing journey and are part of the grieving process. | |
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| I can't fall asleep or I don't sleep well or can't sleep...What should I do? | |
| Grandmother's remedies of a hot bath before you go to bed, or a cup of hot milk may help. Reading or watching TV until you feel really sleepy can also be helpful. Do not nap during the day so that you will be tired at night. Your doctor may be helpful in giving you some counsel as well. | |
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